In life sometimes we have those times where we really want to give up. We want to let go of trying and see what happens. We want someone else to take over and let us take a break. We want to wallow in our sadness, hurt, anger, and confusion. We feel like all hope is lost. Sometimes God sends us little reminders that we aren’t on this journey alone. He is with us every step of the way. It is when we are at our lowest begging God to help that we see these small signs and know we must keep trying. Id like to share a few of these times in my life with you.
I was having a really hard time with seasonal depression. I wasn’t feeling like I was doing a great job as a mother. I was letting my kids down. I was trying but everything always felt wrong and messed up in the process. One Saturday or Sunday I decided to sit in the cry room with Pooh and Baby Kermit. I was hoping it would help me focus more on Mass instead of my failings as a mom. The boys insisted they were done playing after receiving their blessings and wanted to leave. I decided to tidy up the bookshelf in the room while they picked up the toys.When I was reshelving the books I found a beautiful prayer card. It was a prayer card for The Most Important Person on the Earth. I stopped and shed a few tears knowing this beautiful prayer card was for me. I was so thankful to get such a powerful reminder that I am a great mom and my kiddos are my world.
Another more recent incident was when I was having the worst week. It was day 4 of a week that I thought would never end. A doctors appointment that did go as well as I thought, George dealing with some stressful stuff at work, and just feeling like I couldn’t get a handle on things. Those times when even the easy to solve problems seem like the end of the world. That week when you need to wear pants but the laundry hasn’t been done in 3 days. The type of week where even your favorite shirt doesn’t cheer you up. I took Pooh and Baby Kermit to their music class as usual. Duke and Bubbles were quick to finish their school work while I tried my best to get Baby Kermit to participate in class. The teacher read them a few books and they had fun playing with different percussion instruments. It was nothing out of the ordinary for the class. The teacher started reading The Man with the Violin. It’s a book about Joshua Bell playing his violin at Le’fant Plaza in DC. I didn’t pay much attention to the story as the boys were starting to get bored. But the moment the teacher played the song Joshua Bell played that day I had to hold back tears. I knew from the first note it was Ave Maria. I knew with everything in me that Mother Mary was there reminding that I was wrapped in her safe arms and could keep going. That no matter how badly things got she was always there with me.
I am so thankful to have these small but very meaningful reminders. It helps me push through whatever i may be dealing to get back to the good stuff. It reminds me that no matter how bad things get I can always find my way back to where I need to be. I am so blessed. I would love to hear your stories please comment on this post or feel free to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org